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Val’s Day Craze

Today, the 14th day of February 2012

Happy St. Valentine’s day to Y’all

Valentine’s day also known as Val’s day is a day set aside 2 express love to one another but people take it the other way round. Below is my opinion about Val’s day:-

 

Firstly, some people believe it’s a time for great sex or lovemaking. I say no. It’s to show love and not make love. Well you can get opinions from parents of children born in November/December (Thank God nobody in my family was born during these two months *Dancing*)

Secondly, girls have been asking me for explanations as to why they didn’t receive sms & pings from me and this is my reply:

Val’s day is not defined as a day for guys to show love to girls but as a day where people(regardless of gender) show love to each other so I don’t think it is wrong if they do the texting this time around.

Thirdly, for the exchange of gifts, It’s not for only guys to do. Ladies are also to get gifts for their guys and It is very wrong to tell your partner what to get for you or criticise what he/she gets for you. Getting you something(no matter how small or irrelevant shows that he cares).

Lastly: Peeps be wearing red all around and stuff. I even saw a girl wear red bra and a transparent top in the name of Val’s day. The earlier peeps get it right, the better.

 

FYI: SINCE VAL’S DAY CAN’T BE A PUBLIC HOLIDAY, THEN IT IS NOT OF GREAT IMPORTANCE AND SHOULD NOT BE GIVEN HYPE AT ALL….CAN YOU GUYS PLEASE STOP HYPING IT LIKE RIGHT NOW?

 

Thank you

….#OkBye

This Christmas

So today is sunday 25th of december 2011. Christmas spirit but I’m not over whelmed by dat spirit.

I’m quite happy cos I was on the drums in church today after a long time out.
 The food:- I thought chicken was the main thing for christmas but was shocked wen I got a full bowl of rice and a finger like chicken.
 The babes:- all looking unnecessarily beautiful. *My sight is kinda blurry sha*
The spirit:- It doesn’t even look like the christmas I used to know.
*SINGING*
It’s not the christmas I used to know, It’s a shadow of itself.
When I was a kid, christmas was full of fireworks, fire crackers, rockets and other crazy stuffs. Everybody used to stay out late, singing, dancing, playing games, e.t.c *though I used to watch from the window* what in the name of christ are kids of nowadays doing?
And yess d hit-crew just droped 3 new singles. On a christmas day??? DAMN!!!
*sound system playing*
Clap back, we gonna clap back, we gonna clap back (let’s take ’em to war niggaz)
What’s the procedure with a gun in your face when you got one in your waist, It’s clap back Nigga air out the space. *plays till I fall asleep*

just sumfin I stumbled upon

From Toluwase Bolarin on Yookos:
One Sunday a pastor told his congregation that the church needed some extra money and asked the
people to prayerfully consider giving a little extra in the offering plate. He said that whoever gave the
most would be able to pick out three hymns.

After the offering plates were passed, the pastor glanced down and noticed that someone had placed a
$1,000 bill in offering. He was so excited that he immediately shared his joy with his congregation and
said he’d like to personally thank the person who placed the money in the plate.

And there sat our Rosie all the way in the back shyly raised her hand. The pastor asked her to come to
the front. Slowly she made her way to the pastor. He told her how wonderful it was that she gave so
much and in thanksgiving asked her to pick out three hymns.

Her eyes brightened as she looked over the congregation, pointed to the three most handsome men in
the building and said, “I’ll take him and him and him!”

LONG LIVE BACHELORS

Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is not the only thing in life!!

–Anonymous

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —
Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should
be happier than others.

–Oscar Wilde

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —-
Don’t marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.

–Scottish Proverb

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —-
I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

–Sam Kinison
———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —
Men have a better time than women; for one thing,
they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.

–H. L. Mencken

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —
When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why.
When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —
Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —-
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
you can be sure of one thing:

either the car is new or the wife.

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding
her way back to home always.

–Anonymous

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —-
I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go for our
anniversary? ” She said,”Somewhere I have never been!” I told her,
“How about the kitchen?”

–Anonymous

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ———
We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— –
My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours.
That was only for the estimate.

–Anonymous

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— –
She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then
the mud fell off.

–Anonymous

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, “Am I too
late for the garbage?”
Following her down the street I yelled, “No, jump in.”

–Anonymous

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —
Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses
to get to married.
He says “the wedding rings look like miniature
handcuffs… ..”

–Anonymous
———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —
If your dog is barking at the back door and your
wife yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The Dog of course… at least he’ll shut up after u
let him in!

–Anonymous

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly
parted mother and started back toward his car when his attention was
diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be
praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, ‘Why did u have to
die? Why did you have to die?” The first man approached him and said, “Sir,
I don’t wish to interfere with your private grief, but this
demonstration of pain in is
more than I’ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so? Deeply? A
child? A parent?”The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then
replied “My wife’s first husband.”

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— —-
A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband
leaned over, made a wish
and threw in a coin .
The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned
over too much, fell
into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned
for a while but then
smiled “It really works ! ”

TEAM WORK

T = Together
E = Everyone
A = Achieve
M = More

There is nothing like working together.
A tree doesn’t make a forest and a broom stick doesn’t sweep a floor.
A mop thread doesn’t mop a floor and a grain doesn’t feed a mouth.


A Soldier doesn’t make a battalion and a gun doesn’t make an ARSENAL.

……So guys let us learn to work together as a team and work towards the progress of ourselves, one another, the nation and the world as a whole.

……You’ve gotta be starting something.

WHO SAYS MEN DON’T REMEMBER ANNIVERSARIES

A woman awkes during the night to to find that her husband was not in their bed.

She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him. He appears deep in thought just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes the tears off his eyeand takes a sip of coffee.

“What’s the matter dear?” she whispers as she steps into the room. “Why are you down here at this time of the night?” The husband looks up, “Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 17?” he asks solemnly. The wife is touched thinking her husband is so caring and sensitive. “Yes I do, ” she replies.

The husband pauses. The words are not coming easily. “Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?”

“Yes I remember,” says the wife lowering herself into a chair beside him.

The husband continues…”Do you remember when he shoved a shotgun in my face and said, “Either you marry my daughter, or I’ll send you to jail for 20 years?”

“I remember that too”, she replies softly.

He wipes another tear from his cheek and says… “I would have gotten out today!”

MUST READ!!!

I thought this was funny, especially the last couple of lines. ENJOY!
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
______________________________

OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
_____________________________

SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn’t need.
_____________________________

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man. ___________________________
HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all. ______________________________
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
______________________________

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.
__________________________

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_____________________________

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, “You’re next.” They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE SMART GUYS YOU KNOW CAN HANDLE IT